How to Get Through Being Vulnerable to Pornography
One of the things you can do to limit using pornography use is to watch for your most vulnerable times. If you know when you are most vulnerable to pornography, you can take action to protect yourself.
Discouraged by 24 / 7 vigilance
After you’ve made a decision to cut down or stop using pornography, and after your initial enthusiasm wears off, you may well start to experience some discouraged that it’s going to be a lifelong 24 / 7 battle. If you are like many men, pornography has been such a part of your life that you can’t imagine not having it there. Along with that is a fear that you are going to feel the desire to use pornography all the time. In the face of this, many men frankly feel that the odds are impossible and that they will fail.
Walking the narrow tightrope
It’s not surprising. To be constantly on your guard against something which she is driven by powerful forces within you is very difficult. When you set yourself a high standard of not ever failing, the odds against success can seem very daunting – it can seem like a very narrow tightrope to walk.
Getting to know when you are vulnerable to pornography
However, one thing that you can do is to find out more about what of the conditions under which you usually use pornography. Get clear on when and where you use pornography, and how often you use it. If you can find out the particulars of your regular pornography use, you will be be in a better position to wrist resist those urges. Start to understand the factors which make you most vulnerable, such as time of day, what device, what emotional state you are in, what happened before.
Keeping some notes about of your pornography with some notes about these other factors is a great place to start.
When you do this, you’ll be in a better position to work out when you are most vulnerable to using it again.
For instance, I often hear men say that one of their most vulnerable times are late at night after everyone else has gone to bed. For some men, one of their most vulnerable times is after they wake up with a hangover. In both cases, if you can prepare yourself for the temptation of using pornography at these times of increased vulnerability, then you will have a better chance of achieving what you’re trying to achieve.
These preparations can include
- making sure that you’re away from the device that you customarily use (maybe leaving them in a different room)
- getting yourself to a different location (even if this means going out), and,
- making sure you that you’re in the company of someone else.
By using these techniques, the process of cutting down and stopping using pornography seems less overwhelming and thus becomes easier. Sexual desire can be different for different men, but one thing that we do know is that sexual desire tends to build and fade away quite quickly. Practically, this can mean that you don’t have to actively avoid pornography cues all the time, just when things are at their peak.
Let me know what you think in the comments. Now, read about How to Pick Yourself Up After Failure.
– Tim Hill
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